Sugar Daddys and High School Drama

So, there have been a good number of you who have said I should write a book out of my experiences this year. I think you are crazy. But, I was thinking. What good book is missing some romance in the storyline? None of the books I read. Ok, you caught me, when I am home, I read romance novels like an addict. I blame my mom for getting me hooked on the literary equivalent of chick flicks. But, in my defense, I have read some intellectual books recently, The Awakening, The Alchemist, The Angry Archer (yes, I made that last one up, I just realized a theme of "The A" and I wanted to continue it.) But, lets put the fact that I read trashy romance novels aside for now and lets talk about sex, baby. No, I don't mean it. I don't really wanna talk about sex. Let's talk about romance.

I've been romanced like crazy the past few weeks. I swear, men are coming out of the woodwork like termites. Men offering me rides, gum, or just innocent chats over coffee. Unfortunately, the men are all old. Somehow, in the past few weeks, I have become the world's most powerful middle aged man magnet. I first discovered this in the Bethel airport when I was waiting to meet up with my mom and brother in Oregon. This man kept smiling at me, which is fine, everyone can smile away at me, unless they are laughing at the fact that my zipper is down... then I will be sad. But anyway, my zipper was up, I didn't have anything funny stuck to my face and yet, he was still smiling. Then, he took a seat a few seats away, there were two or three people between us, but he leans over, looks at me and asks, "Would you like a piece of gum?" I politely refused and waited for him to offer the gum to the two people he had leaned over. Nope, just me. Old man conquest #1.

Old man conquest #2 came just a few short hours later when I was sitting on the plane from Anchorage to Seattle. I was sitting in the window seat and a middle aged man came and sat in the aisle. He immediately struck up a conversation, which continued throughout boarding, even though another, larger, man came and sat down between us. After a while, I somehow hinted strongly enough that I wanted to sleep (maybe it was when I turned on my iPod and closed my eyes that he finally got it) and he stopped. But, when we were getting off the plane, he kindly offered me a ride home. But, don't worry, my mommy warned me about getting in cars with strange men.

Old man conquest #3,4, 5. These were reallllly old men. Mom, Alan and I were eating breakfast one morning at a little restaurant and were sitting right next to three men my grandfather's age. One of the men hadn't been sitting there 2 minutes before he started up a random conversation with me. Let's just say, I had those three men wrapped around my little finger by the end of breakfast.

Last, but not least, old man conquest #6. By the time I was back in the Seattle airport getting ready to head back to Bethel, I was consistently checking to see if there was a sign above me that said, "Looking for a Sugar Daddy." While I was looking, I must have hit the sign into hyper-mode because I had my most random encounter yet. I was standing in line at Starbucks to buy my mom a cup of tea and the man in front of me turns around and starts telling me all about how he is an injured vet and how he loves travelling then asks where I live. After I answer, he goes into this long lecture about the beauty of Alaska finally admitting in the end that he has never lived there. Wow. I just want the tea. And an ability to attract men my own age. Is that too much to ask?

There is good news though. I think the conquests are over, maybe it is a lower 48 phenomenon. Who knows. But, the romance is not over. Don't worry. This past weekend I was a chaperone at the BRHS homecoming dance. BRHS is the local high school and BABS students are not allowed unless they have a BABS chaperone. I didn't know about the dance in general, or the rules about chaperones until about 3 hours before the dance when one of my students came up to me at a Haitian fundraiser my roommates and I were working at, and asked me to chaperone so she could go. As you all know, I am a bit of a sucker and couldn't say no. So, I deserted the auction/concert/dinner to benefit Hati in order to fulfill a much more noble calling, a high school dance chaperone.

I have a weird history with high school dances. I never had a great high school dance, something always went wrong. So, walking into BRHS, with no idea what to do or where I was supposed to go, I was a little apprehensive. I didn't want to be that annoying chaperone who thinks she is one of the kids and busts out scary dance moves. I didn't want to be that meddling chaperone who walks around with a ruler yelling out "LEAVE ROOM FOR JESUS!" (Ok, maybe I wanted to be that chaperone... I was just too much of a wimp) So anyway, it was real awkward. I just kind of stood against the wall, hoping the time would pass fast so I could leave and meet up with some other friends. To be fair though, it was also hilarious. I got to watch my student from BABS dance with her "friend" who looked like he was having a seizure. I watched the girls dance desperately in front of a bench full of mostly disinterested guys. I watched the cliques form, just like they did in my high school. I found my crew, the awkward weirdo girls who just kind of danced with themselves and were generally ignored by everyone else. (Look how far I've come! Haha) It was a blast from the past for sure. But, by the time the dance was over, I was happy to leave. On my way out though, I saw two people down a corridor of lockers, looking like they were about to suck each other's mouths off. I paused for a moment, wondering if I should break it up, you know, be a good chaperone and all. But, I decided to keep going, I wanted to be a cool chaperone. (And I just wanted to leave...)

After I left, I headed over to a gathering of some friends. There, I was surrounded by more awkward hilarious dancing, fun friends, entertaining conversations and to my glee, a vodka tonic. After a very stressful and sometimes painful couple of weeks, I think this weekend (also filled with open mic night, a dance party for Joe's birthday, making a lemon cake and cinnamon bagels, yes I made homemade bagels! and just some quality time with my roommates) was exactly what I needed. OH! Before I forget. Another highlight of my weekend. Getting thanked for being a chaperone. The BRHS student who asked my BABS student just happens to be a Klejka, my faithful blog followers should recognize that name. Well, Jesse came by on Sunday to thank me for chaperoning so that Mary (BABS student) could go. He even gave me a gift! A half-eaten can of Pringles. WOW. Thanks Jesse. But, then today, Mary brought me a bunch of brownies and an awesome and super sweet thank you note. I bet you can guess who is my favorite. Chaperoning suddenly seems so much more worth it. Haha.

Now, I realized I haven't said much about my job recently. It is soooo much fun. I love my students, they like me most of the time and I feel so blessed to work with them. They keep my own life in perspective, they challenge me to think outside the box, they try to teach me Yup'ik (I have great pronunciation but an awful memory) they ask me about my relationships and then laugh when I tell them some stories of my relationship mishaps. I have also discovered that I love tutoring science. One of my students is doing science on independent study and I love 3rd period because that is when I get to pull out all of the knives and forks and cups and whatever else I can find for 3-D diagrams of atoms or the solar system or whatever needs explaining. I think I should go back to school and take more science classes. I shouldn't have stopped at just one in college. I feel like being at BABS has totally amplified my passions, tutoring, math, laughter, science, poetry, honesty. I don't know what I am going to do without all of my awesome, inspiring kids. Good thing I have a whole semester with them left!

As for life after JVC, I have no idea. Maybe I want to go teach English in another country, maybe I want to move to Montana and work at Cramer Creek, maybe I want to go to grad school (uh... no, I don't wanna do that yet, sorry Dad!), maybe I want to stay in Bethel. I just know that I am not ready to make that decision, I have some that I am leaning towards more than others, but for right now, I am happy where I am at, in my life, geographically and emotionally.

But of course, I still love and miss you all. I hope you are doing well!